My First Day of School.

Luckily, my first day of class happened to be the one day I don’t have to get up at six thirty in the morning. I rode my bike and arrived much earlier than anticipated. Entering GB’s main building, I proceeded to get lost while trying to find the Tim Horton’s. Checking the time, I thought it better to have a pre-class cigarette than to keep looking, so I stood outside sizing up the other culinary students loitering on the sidewalk. With about ten minutes to spare, I walked into the culinary school, officially a student. A chef in training. My journey begins.

I get lost again on the way to class. Finding the room, I notice other students sitting inside and walk right by. I make a lap of the floor, trying to look like I know what I’m doing. Finally returning, I enter, make eye contact with no one and slink into a seat mid-way through the room next to a guy I never look at. A few people are already decked out in the Chef Uniforms. I check to see if the hole in the crotch of my jeans has increased in size. Two students, fresh out of high school by the looks of things, engage each other in loud, stupid banter, trying to show off for a class that doesn’t care. (Loud Mouth #1 is congenial; annoyingly self-promoting but likable -- Loud Mouth #2 is just plain dumb). Our instructor is a man I instantly adore and am disgruntled upon hearing that he is just filling in for our normal teacher.

Class (Food Theory):

Upon taking Roll Call, we are immediately ordered to stand and evacuate the building. Apparently it’s not enough to explain that in case of a fire, leave; we actually have to shuffle down three flights of stairs and flood the sidewalk in order for the demonstration to be complete. The Temp Chef then tries (and fails) to unleash a power point presentation, finally settling on showing us the YouTube sensation Matt Harding and his funny dancing in different locations around the world. The point of this entertaining aside is lost on me. We are assigned homework from a book I have yet to purchase and are released. My first lunch as a Chef In Training is a veggie sub from Subway.

Class (Diet and Nutrition):

I arrive back to the building early, so I smoke while watching the door to see if I recognize anyone. I see both Loud Mouths. I get lost on the way to class, but manage to arrive early. I pick a chair with a two-seat buffer between me and the next person so am annoyed when someone opts to sit right next to me. The instructor for the class is an extremely likable woman by the name of Billie Jane. She claims that her favourite food right now is pizza with spelt dough. Both Loud Mouth #1 and #2 are in the class and are continuing with their idiotic self indulgence.

Class ends early and I leave, happy to hop on my bike and head home.

I can only assume that eventually this blog will have to do with cooking.